cezhile_28

my dream today

2010-06-22T06:16:00.000-07:00

june 22, 2010

I had a dream that my bf went home already. The scenario is that we went out. Then though I was all out in giving my attention to him, he neglects me. He takes me for granted. Actually this has been always my "BAD dreams" lately. I don't know why it is always like that, and though it was just a dream, I hate the feeling! ugh!..

*F.Y.I --> I wrote my dream today and plans to write every dream that I had so that I won't happen.., I guess?.. Or if it happens, we'll at least I've written it first before it happened. :P

Today's msg.

2010-06-18T00:04:00.000-07:00

Progress doesn't always move in a straight line. In fact, in order to reach to your ultimate goal, often you have to backtrack through territory you thought was well behind you so you can learn something you missed the first time around. Stressing out about lost time isn't worth the worry, though. Just sit back and enjoy the scenery -- after all, isn't that the point of life?

2006-07-06T08:44:00.000-07:00

hmmm..now, i can feel the pressure of being a nursing student.. haii..aside from the other co-curricular activities that we are going to have and encounter, hmm.. i can say that this career is really a tough one. Aside from that, i also feel pressured of the people around me when the topic is all about love. From what one of my friends told me.."cez, haba ng hair huh..muLtiple choice ang pagpi2lian..u have to choose nah".. arrghh.. but I CAN'T..! I feel that everyone of them is all the same. I don't feel that they are serious enough to love and be loved. I don't want to have a traumatic experience when it comes to heart matters.. When can I say that a person will love me truly? and how can I trust them of my heart?! It's maybe confusing for me because up to now, i still don't know the answer why break-ups just come along in a relationship, especially when they are committed for a long time, like for instance a year or years..

I just maybe have to believe in magic. As what the song says.."Got to believe in magic..Tell me how to people find each other...In a world that's full of strangers.."

Is it my fault of not trusting anyone of my heart?.. I once gave my trust to a person but he destroyed it without maybe knowing that he did. I thought he is different from other guys or man that I've met, but no..I was wrong! I just hope & wish that someday, I'll find the right one.. the man who is not a chickboy or playboy. The one who will let me love myself first before loving him and the one who will not take me for granted..

--->>> *cez* <<<---

i broke my promise!

2006-05-28T10:02:00.000-07:00

oh my God..! i thought i can do it but the opposite happened..In my previous blog, i promise myself to forget the guy I think I'm falling in love with.. It's simply because things may seem very complicated if i'll say what I feel..but i think the result just went worst! ='(

i think it became more complicated because the more i'm hiding it, the more i'm falling in love with him..huhuhu! i really don't want this kind of feeling because it can maybe ruin our friendship.. what if he doesn't feel the same way? How can i deal with it?! huhuhu! i'm really out of mind this past few days.. tsk tsk tsk..!

I really felt hurt when i saw him with other girl.. yes, i know that i don't have any right to feel that way but tears just fell down my face that moment.. I know he was also shocked when he saw me..but atleast i've known & seen the reality! It really hurts..huhuhu! but i should not be a hindrance to his happiness, so if he really wants the girl I saw he was with then I'll be happy for him,,even if it relly hurts inside!

I've already told some of my friends about this & they all got one advice for me..>>"get real and say what i feel!"..hmmp.. easy to say but very hard to do! =(

well, one thing is for sure.. God knows what's best for me..so i think, i'll just let things happen just the way it is..If i get hurt in the process, it's my fault! I just want to be happy and if it will be its consequence, then let it be..!

>>>> cez <<<<<

it's OVER!

2006-04-09T09:42:00.000-07:00

Dealing with the feelings of a human being is the hardest in this world...! minsan alam mong mali pero u can't get rid of it! i know that we should not be pretenders in this world especially with our feelings for other people pero sometimes u can't actually notice that u are already doing it..!

okie,,okie.. i'm talking of myself...! damn!! hehe..! ;p i don't know how did it happed..but promise!! i never forced or intended it to happened.. it just did!! nong una nga, i don't know how to deal with it, coz from what i've noticed from some of my friends with the same experienced..haii naku..it did not worked out! auin,, kea i've decided to do nothing!!

nweiz,, its just maybe a matter of ACCEPTANCE!!! grabehh.. hirap ma-in-love sa FRIEND mo noh.. hirap magsbe that u want him na..that you finally fell in love with him!! haaiiii! lalo na kapag ndi mo alam kng mutual ba kau ng feelings or ikaw lang ang nakakaramdam ng ganun! ai sus!! grabeehh!! feeling ko sasabOg na t0h..!! pero takot kc aq sa RISKS eh! i don't want to do something coz i'm not ready for its consequences! --- grabeh ndi kc aq gnun katapang ehh-- tsk tsk tsk!! sbe nga niLa REGRETS can last a lifetime!! siguro nga true un pero its how things just happend ehh.. for me, i just want to let this feeling go rather than to be rejected by someone! ewww!! negative thinker ba ako para sabhin un.??! e kce pano kng parehas pala kme ng feelings kso we are just both faced with the same situati0n??! aba..dpat kng gusto nia aq mauna xang magsbe.. lalake namn xa noh.. dyahe kea kapag gurl ang unang nagburst out ng feelings.. He should be the first one to make the move! Kea nga sa dictionary mas una ang "HE" sa "SHE" ehh! try mong tignan k0ng ndi ka kumbinsido sa cnabe koh! ahehe..

"People tend to look for a lesson to ease the pain!" --sex in the city; at yan nga ang gagawin koH! hehe..

lesson: MOVE-ON!! be happy.. maybe there is something better in store for me kea i should not rush things up! c0z there are lots of BETTER MAN out there.. I believe so..! everything happens at the perfect time, place, and moment for that PERFECT MAN for me! Now, i'm making its OFFICIAL that im ready to get rid of him.. End point nitoh I'VE LOVED HIM..!!! so,, PERIOD na un!! walang kama (,), semi-colon (;), or question mark (?) na dapat matira.. If he doesn't want me.. fine! if he wants me, he should have the guts to say it..! After all, being COURAGEOUS of expressing his feelings means he really wants to keep me..! So from now April 10, 2006 @ 9am i'm saying --- IT's OVER!!! ---

---> cez <<---

birthday blast..

2005-10-10T12:02:00.000-07:00

hmm.. haven't signed in my blog for a week.. our internet connections at home is still not working... argggh.. we dnt know what's the problem of that comp... grrrrrr!

nwez, time flies so fast.. It was as just a year ago when I had my debut.. now, i again had my bday and i'm officially a 19-year ald gal.. hmmp.. haha! My parents asked me then of what will I do on my bday, I just told them that I want a new cell phone because my old fone was already 2 years in my hand.. hehe! I've been searching in the internet of what the best cell phone can be fitted for me.. Actually, I found the Samsung i700 a very interesting one, yet when I solicited for its price, I've found out that it was not yet in the market! arrghh! Maybe its not really the type of phone that is meant for me! waahH!

On the nice part of the story, I still got a new cellphone.. My parents bought me a Sony Ericsson P910i.. It's kinda big in size, but in spite of that, its a very high-tech gadget at hand with lots of new stuffs and exciting features in it! haha! It costs my parents a 23, 500 pesos. At first I thought I couldn't have it because the budget alloted for my cellphone is suppose to be just a 20,000 box. Thank God my nanay and tatay was really kind hearted for they still allowed me to have that phone! (^^,) -- I really LOVE them so much! mwaah!

A birthday blast happened to me because before they bought me a new cellphone, I still got the chance to invite some friends in PLM to have a simple salu-salo at home.. hehe! We ate at least 8 different foodstuffs with Liempo as the especialty.. haha! My friends really enjoyed it and we had fun during that day! Whew! Hope it will happen again!

So, that's it for now.. (^_^)

argghh! (T_T)

2005-09-23T22:08:00.000-07:00

hmm,, nothings change... (^^,)

i got home at about 5:30 today,, mejo exhausting day pero aus lang.. Mejo hindi nga naging maganda pakiramdam ko ngaung araw dhil halos parang nagkasakit ako ngaun pero i still need to go to class, mahirap maiwan sa mga lessons e.. kaya 'no choice' tsk tsk tsk.. grabehh,, halos guzto ko na nga umiyak kanina sa sobrang sakit ng stomach ko.. promiz!! kya nong pumunta me ng clinic, eon pinainom naman nila ako ng gamot,,kaya nong mga bandang 3 o'clock na, mejo magaling na ung sakit ng tiyan ko and mejo naging okei na rin ako.. (^_^)

pagkagaling from school, binuksan ko agad itong computer para gawin agad ung mga pinaggawa ng prof namen sa Info Tech na sobrang dame.. grabbeehh tlgah!! kelangan ng umpisahan ngaun un para before ang due date, which is on friday, e mapasa nah,, tsk tsk tsk! bc bc-han na nman ako diz wik! ARGGH!! sana nga lng magawa ko na xa as soon as possible!!

ahmm,, nga pla.. may natutunan akong bagong lesson ngaung araw na 'to.. cgro un ung hinahanap kong sagot from the tasks na ginagawa namen, (krishna, meckz) which is the yearbook.. Kase naman nakakainiz ang mga tao,, hai naku,, kse ung yearbook kng ndi namen aackasuhin e wla na talagang ga2wa.. naiiniz lang ako, kce sbe ko kla meckz, cgro kung may incentive or parang 'grade' ang paggawa ng yearbook, definitely tapos na un,, cgro kng may award lang ang maka2gawa ng yearbook nong 4th year pa kme, ang dame na cguro nagpaunhan para gawin un!! tsk tsk tsk! ka2gigil!! arrgghh! isa pang naka2iniz,, e ung mga taong nagta2nong kung kamusta na ba ung yearbook namen.. aus lang sana mangamusta kng how its been doing, kung may progress ba or what kce parang kahit paano e mejo concern sila (sana?!) or kng gusto lang nila icheck ung yearbook,, kaso ung iba kase reklamador pah! kame pa ang sinisisi kung baket ang tagal ng yearbook! tsk tsk tsk! kaasar! wag sana nila kmeng ibLame kce it's not our fault,, ewan ko ba kng baket napakairresponsible ng ibang tao! haayy!! pero kagaya nga ng sbe ng nanay ko, may Diyos! lahat nman kce ng gingawa nten e naki2ta nya, kaya kahit mapancin, makita, maapreciate or balewalaen lang ng mga tao sa paligid ang mga gingawa namen, he can see it!! xa na lang ang bahala in the future! hehe! bazta anjan lang palage si God.. he's just watching us!

nweiz, kinda weird but im not feeling good.. hmmp,, parang i want to scream!!! pero ndi ko naman alam ang isisigaw ko! hahaha! *sigh* geh,, gtg.. BIG BROTHER na kase eh! haha! *mwaH*

i'm surprised!!

2005-09-17T11:07:00.000-07:00

whew!! sa wakas, natapos ko ng basahin ung novel na "NO BOYFRIEND SINCE BIRTH".. hehe! i was surprised by the ending because it can be maybe Mike, the guy who always teased Rudie everyday, who could be her first boyfriend!.. Life is really full of surprises! nweiz,, juz read na lang the novel, it is fun, ndi nakakaboring and has lots of twists! (^^,)

Part nong novel, Rudie asked herself...

"Will I ever find true love? But before that, will I ever have a boyfriend? How does it feel to have someone to love and trust and be with everyday? Someone to call when work sucks, or watch a concert or movie with just to relax? Someone you can turn to and confide in and ask advice from and rely on --- because you know that he shares the same perspective as you? because you know that he sees the world through your eyes.." --> share ko lang! hehe!

Maybe once in my life, I've also shared the same thoughts as Rudie.. Kase nman noh i'm already 18 years old pero i've never been committed to any relationships.. arrgh! Kahit once!! That sucks of course, pero nowadays, parang okei na lng saken! hehe! Now, I'm not looking for one person to love. I'm not deliberately looking anymore. But my ayes are wide open for many lovable persons out there who are equally capable of giving me love! haha! (^_^)

In summarizing it, may point si Rudie when she said that..

"What was I doing thinking that all it takes to find true love is a good marketing plan? Being an idiot, that's what. There are just some things that are immeasurable, unpredictable, and therefore fun, exciting and cosmic. It's not something you can make calculations on in order to arrive at the desired result. It's not something you can make a goal of.."

-->> Love does happen at the right time!! (^^.) ... cEz <<--

a different FriDaY!

2005-09-16T19:15:00.000-07:00

hmm,, today, i had a nice daY! HEHE,, actually compare ko sa mga past fridays namen, hai naku super nakakastress tlgah,, buti na lang tapos na report namen about Spanish Colonization which took us 2 meetings, each meeting 3 hours ahh.. (oh dba ang haba ng reposrt nmen,, at ang bigat pa ng LaPtop! whew!) and natapos na din nmen ung mga paper works namen sa Info. Tech.. haii,, buti naman magiging masaya na nman ang life namen nila Krishna and Ana dahil tapos na lahat ng dapat tapusin!! hehehe,,(^^,)

ganito kase un, every friday ang day na sobrang nakakapagod para smen.. kce we are going to go to class which is History & Government at 10 am and will end at 1 pm..wala kameng break dhil 1 pm naman magestart ung info. Tech namen hanggang 4! whew! grabeh diba,, kaya tuwing friday kung pede lang wag mkipagkita sa mga frendz namen e ga2win nmen,,hehe!! kce baka bgla kmeng tanungin,, "stress ka??!" hehe.. yan lagi ang punch line namen kapg friday.. Pero iba ngaung araw na to! hehehe...

May quiz kame sa HisGov about Spanish Colonization,, haii naku kung magre2view ako daig ko pa ang nag-aral para sa finals dahil sobrang haba tlga non! kaya in short, hindi ako nagreview! heheh! bahaLa na si Batman kung baga! haha! kaya nong nagQuiz kme knina nagulat ako dhil 1/4 ng yellow paper lang ang hiningi ng professor namen na mukhang habang tumatagal e bumabaet! infairness sa kanya ahH! hehe! eon, mejo madali lang ung quiz niya.. kaya aus lng tlga kung ndi ka nag-aral basta dapat nakinig ka sa kanya.. tapos after the quiz, dhil absent ung mga next reporters, diniscuss na lang ng prof namen ung ibang part nong American period.. tapos nagpaggawa xa ng activity samen.. & then, while doing the said activity, pinasa ko na sa kanya ung written report nmen.. heheh! tuwang-tuwa xa ah dahil may picture nmeng 3 un.. heheh.. wala lang napagtripan lang namen lagyan ng picz nmen para maiba nman! heheh!

pagkatapos non, nagpunta na kme ng McDo para kumain kce maaga kme dinismiss ni Mr. Ramos! hehe,, kea un.. habang andon kme, binigay na sken ni Ana ung book na "No Boyfriend Since Birth".. haii, out of stock na tlga xa kaya nanghiram na lang ako.. hehe! sa wakas mababasa ko na ang book na dati ko pa trip basahim.. yepey! Habang kumakain kame, pinapanalangin ni Krishna na sana namn daw wala si Mr. San Pedro.. heheh.. aba!?! mukhang effective! heheh.. wala nga kameng prof! heheh! yehey na namn! nagpa2plano na kme manood ng sine non kso may play sa skul and sbe kpag nanood daw kme may incentive daw sa subject nmen! HMMP,, no choice! hehe,, kya pinanood na lng namen ung play.. Aba?! infairness sa mga Maguayen, (nagorganize nong play) ang ganda ng play nila which is entitled "Ang Prinsipe ng Marulaya".. parang korny and boring diba pero maganda ang story niya and mejo may pagkaComedy kaya ndi naka2antok panoorin.. panalo sila.. galing! (^_^)

"God is good all the time.. All the time God is good!"

mwah!

-->> cez <<--

tired??

2005-09-15T13:13:00.000-07:00

haii naku,, life is rily a very tiring job!! hehe.. ndi nman ako maxadong busy this days, pero i juz feel that parang minsan "pagod na ko"! whew! maybe i juz need more time for my self...

last night, habang nanonood ako ng tv, one of the casts of the show said that.."People tend to look for a lesson to ease the pain!".. haii,, when i heard that, parang tinamaan ako!! hehe! ewan ko ba,, ang motto ko e "everthing happens for a reason!".. kapag there is something going on na ndi maxadong good or maganda, hindi pedeng hindi ko sabihin sa mga frendz ko ung motton ko! heheh! kce i rily do believe in it.. Pero minsan, i also asks myself,, ano ba tlga ung mga reasons na yon??! haaiiii,, i hope i'll know it before everyone does para alam ko na ang dapat kong gawing moves.. Lahat ba ng nangyayari sa buhay natin e may lesson?! or are we just looking for it to be able to surpass our life's struggles for happiness and love?!

anyways,, so much for this na nga.. wala lang siguro akong magawa kaya biglang ang daming questions and pumapasok sa utak ko this past few days! hehehe.. i just wish that before my birthday comes,,i'll know myself better.. (^^,)

2005-08-12T20:07:00.000-07:00

To realize
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.

To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.

To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.

To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother
who gave birth to a still born.

To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
who has given birth to a premature baby.

To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize
The value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to Meet.

To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident...

To realize
The value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics

Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
you can share it with someone special.

To realize the value of a friend:
Lose one.

Give importance to the peopleyou have now.
Show you care and love them!! *cez*

what huRts the most!!!

2005-05-24T09:28:00.000-07:00

Yeah...yeahOh...oh...Oh...

Listen Boy, it’s been a long time
Since the last time I saw you
Feels like nothin’ changed
Since we’ve been together
I must admit that I go crazy for you

And I can see it in your eyes
That there’s somethin’ you want to say to me
’cause usually right now
You’ll be holdin’ on to me
But instead you tell me

Things have changed, they’re not the same
And recently you found someone that you
Decided to dedicate your whole life to
And what we had is ’bout to be through

And baby, what hurts the most is letting go
I just want you to know that I love you so
I know things are different now, you’ve gone and settled down
And I thought for sure you’d always wait me

I’ll tell you what hurts the most is I should have took the chance
Boy, when you came to me and offered me your hand
Silly of me I thought I’ll always have your heart
I had the chance to have all the love oh, how I’m missing now

I hate that there is someone new
Comin’ in and takin’ my place
Doin’ the things that we used to do
And makin’ love to you

And oh, what am I supposed to do
It’s killin’ me ’cause I want you
And you should have known my love was true
And there’s no one else in this world for me but you

But things have changed, they’re not the same
And recently you found someone that you
Decided to dedicate your whole life to
And what we had is ’bout to be through
And baby, what hurts the most is letting go

What hurts the most is letting go
Just to let you know I love you so
What hurts the most is letting go
Just to let you know I love you so

----->> hahaha!

^_^ All my Life ^_^

2005-01-13T23:12:00.000-08:00

I will never find another lover

Sweeter than you

I will never find another lover

More precious than you

more precious than you

Girl You are

Close to me just like my mother,

Close to me just like my father,

Close to me just like my sister,

Close to me just like my brother

You are the only one my everything

And to you this song I sing

(Chorus)

All my lifeI pray for someone like you

And I thank God that I

That I finally found you, baby

And all my life

I pray for someone like you

And I hope that you feel the same way too

Yes, I pray that you do love me to

(I'd send you all that I'm thinking of, baby)

I promise to never fall in lovewith a stranger

You're all I'm thinking of

I praise the Lord above

For sending me your love

I cherish every hug

I really love you (so much)

(Chorus)

All my life(baby, baby),

I pray for someone like you

And I thank God that I

That I finally found you, baby

And all my life

I pray for someone like you

And I hope that you feel the same way too

Yes, I pray that you do love me to

You're everything I ever know,when you smile my face

Always seems to glow,

You turn my life around,

You pick me upwhen I was down,

And I hope that you

Feel the same way too

Yes I pray that you do

Love me too

You're everything I ever know,

when you smile my face

Always seems to glow,

You turn my life around,

You pick me upwhen I was down,

And I hope that you

Feel the same way too

Yes I pray that you do

Love me too

(Chorus)

All my life

I pray for someone like you

And I thank God that I

That I finally found you, baby

And all my lifeI pray for someone like you

And I hope that you feel the same way too

Yes, I pray that you do love me to

--cEz_12--

for a friend.. --=12=--

2005-01-05T22:02:00.000-08:00

Smile In Your Heart

I had a feeling that you're holding my heart
And I know that it is true
You wouldn't let it be broken apart
Cause it's too much too dear to you

Forever we'll be together
No one can break us apart
for our love will truly be
A wonderful smile in your heart

When the night comes and I'm deep in your arms
How I feel so much more secure
You wouldn't let close my eyes
So I can see you through and through

You're a sweet tender lover
We are so much in love
I'm not afraid when you're far away
Just give me a smile in your heart

You brighten my day
You're showing me my direction
You're coming to me
And giving me inspiration
How can I ask for more from you my dear?
Maybe just a smile your heart

I'm always dreaming of being in love
But now I know that this is true
Since you came into my life
It's true love that I had found

I pray that you wouldn't leave me
Whaterver may come along
But if you I won't feel so bad
Just give me a smile in your heart

Maybe just a smile in your heart
Maybe just a smile in your heart

--cEz--

A realization of Letting Go..

2004-11-18T21:28:00.000-08:00

When To Let GO of someone you really LOVE??!!

Imagine this my friend. In your hand is a very precious creation, so fragile, so valuable that if you keep on holding, it would either stay or fall apart. But you loved this creature so much, so much that letting it go would be like letting go of your life as well. So much that sometimes you wished it would be there forever. So much that you tend to be selfish at times so as you could make it stay for as long as you like. Don’t we all wish something so good could be forever? Don’t we all hope that happiness is there to stay?

There comes a time in our lives when we chance upon someone so nice and almost perfect and we just find ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that person (sometimes without even realizing it). This feeling soon become a part of our everyday lives and eventually guzzles our thoughts and actions to the extent that we tagged it as one of those too good to be true thing.

One person said, never ever let your heart run your life, as much as you can, always be sensible and let your mind speak for itself. Try to listen not merely on what your feelings is invoking on you as a person but more importantly listen to reason as well. Letting go of someone doesn't necessarily mean you have to stop loving, it only means that you allow that person to find their own happiness without expecting them to come back. Letting go is not just setting the other person free (in the real sense of it), but it is also setting yourself free from all animosity, revulsion, and resentment that was long kept in your heart. You have to let go because the bitterness often puts away the strengths and weakens the littlest hope, making our lives more miserable than ever. Worst, presenting yourself as the most affected one sets the nastiest impression of all time--whatta a loser!

The trick there is...always remember that if you lose someone today, it means that someone better is coming tomorrow. If you lose love that doesn't mean that you failed in love...right? Just regard it as another mismatch of heaven! Well, you can cry of course, or whine or shout (growl even) if you have to, but make sure that after those outbursts you have washed away the hurt and the bitterness that the past has left with you (easy said than done I know!). We can all survive with just beautiful memories of the past but real peace and happiness come only with open acceptance of what reality is today. You really don't have to forget someone you love (cause I know it’s very hard). What we need to learn is how to accept the verdict of reality without being bitter or sorry for what we have become. I think its better that we give off that dedication and love to someone more deserving.

Hmmm..."Who could it be" is the next interesting question to ponder.

Let go of yesterday and love will find its way back to you (I hope). And when it does, pray hard that it may be the love that will stay and last a lifetime.

whooOoAaA!!! hoW sWeeT!

2004-11-09T18:15:00.000-08:00

Wherever You Are

i love to see the oceans beauty
and the moon that shines above
alone in the sand looking at the stars
wishing someday i will find true love

would it be nice to see the morning
with the one you love the most
would it be nice to say goodnight
to the one you hold so close
to your heart, to your heart

the wind that blows the dove
is the wind that blows my love
hope it'll find its way to you
wherever you are

i love to sit in fields of green
looking deeply through the sky
watching birds as they flap by
hoping someday faith will bring me true love

would it be nice to hold someone
so dear and near your heart
would it be nice to hear those words
i love you from the one
that you love, that you love

the wind that blows the dove
is the wind that blows my love
hope it'll find its way to you
wherever you are

the wind that blows the dove
is the wind that blows my love
hope it'll find its way to you
wherever you are

id love to see myself oneday
in the arms of someone
who will share her life with me
selflessly
someday, you will find your way

to where.... ohhhh
yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah yeah yeaaaaah oohhh

the wind that blows the dove
is the wind that blows my love
hope it'll find its way to you
wherever you are

the wind that blows the dove
is the wind that blows my love
hope it'll find its way to you
wherever you are

wherever you... are

juSt say...

2004-11-09T18:10:00.000-08:00

If The Feeling Is Gone

If the feeling is gone
please don't pretend that you still love me
I can see it in your eyes
and it hurts to admit it
I can't tell that the feeling is gone

All i ask is just a little honestly
Though i know that you're not coming back to me
You know i'll do anything to make you stay
But i just have to let you know
If the feeling is gone

There is sadness in your smile
Though it try to conceive it
I can't tell if the feeling is gone

All i ask is just a little honestly
Though i know that you're not coming back to me
You know i'll do anything to make you stay
But i just have to let you know
If the feeling is gone

All i ask is just a little honestly
Though i know that you're not coming back to me
You know i'll do anything to make you stay
But i just have to let you know
I just have to let you know
If the feeling is gone....

my first classcardzz...

2004-10-19T09:40:00.000-07:00

oh my gosh!! that was my first impression last Oct. 18, 2004.. that was the day our classcards will be distributed and will be given to us.. I was Late!! heheh!! we are expected to be in school at about 8:30 because the first classcard which is EPI will be given.. grabeehh!! I arrived in school at about 9:30.. i was late for an hour and I really felt bad for that because I thought that I'm not going to get my classcard then.. but luckily, when i arrived and got through the lobby of our school, I saw Krishna who was then already texting me and asking me where am I already..then.. she gave my classcards in I think three of my subjects.. It was in EPI, Chemitry and Sociology..

I was shocked when I first saw my grades in EPI and Chemistry because I thought that I'm going to have low grades from that subjects.. Still, I got 1.75 in both subjects..Praise God!! honestly speaking,when our sem break started, I was already praying for that two subjects because just for the fact that our prof in English doesn't give high grades and for my class standing in Chemistry, (my blockmates can attest to that that our chemistry subject in not an ordinary one..I am still lucky to be given that grade!!) Actually, I am just praying to have even a 2 or 2.5 grade because it was really tough subjects.. but then.. God is really so good.. he gave me a 1.75.. Imagine the powers of Prayers!! whoa!! that was really unexpected.. nweiz, im so happy for the results of the said two subjects...

About my Sociology grade, to be honest, it was not very shocking for me.. because I was already expecting for that grade because when we had our finals, I had a grade of 1.5 and our prof explained to us that if we don't have any absences and if we are going to do good in his recitation our final grade can jump one step higher.. so i got 1.25 in Sociology..

Hmm.. what else.. about my grade in Algebra.. huhuh!! I was not that vey happy for it.. I got 1.5.. Not that because I want a higher grade, it's just that,for me 1.5 is not enough for the efforts that I've given in this subject..Sad.. bad it's okei.. 1.5 isn't bad anyway!!

My Psychology grade is 1.25 and in Sining ng Komunikasyon it is also a 1.25 grade.. I don't have any comments for these two subjects because I don't give either less or more efforts for these subjects.. I just did what I am supposed to do so a grade of 1.25 is not very controversial to talk about...hehehe!!

Summing up my grades... here it is:

PSYCHOLOGY (3) --- 1.25
SOCIOLOGY (3) --- 1.25
SINING NG KOM (3) --- 1.25
ALGEBRA (3) --- 1.50
EPI (3) --- 1.75
CHEMISTRY (5) --- 1.75

To end this.. hmm.. I think the results of my classcards is a satisfying one.. for my sleepless nights (hmm..am I serious? hehe) and for the times that I sacrificed watching t.v. just to study (when??hehe!!), it is a good way of starting my second sem in one of the most prestigious school in our country, PLM. I finally got my GWA or General weighted Average and I'm proud to say that it is a total of 1.4875.. that's not bad.. heheh.. I hope that in my second sem in PLM, my grades will be the same or if not, it will be a higher one..Hope so!! hehe! so that's it.. that's the results of my first classcards in PLM...

wonDering....

2004-10-18T21:17:00.000-07:00

hmm.. im just wondering right now..(as the title states nga..) if maybe someone or somebody can answer me when is the right time, place, and exact date of seeing the right and perfect guy foe me..I may sound like "huLLer cecile? you know that no one can answer such question" but i just don't know but honestly these past few days i'm feeling loneLy..huhuhu!!=(

I don't know why i'm feeling this pero wala lang.. i'm just maybe confuse of myself because im already a Lady (nice) but still i cannot ignore the truth that I should already have that "special some1" in my life.. asus!! drama ko noh! pero siguro nga God is still preparing that "man" for me.. Hope so.. that's all for now.. (time n kce ehh)hehe!!

Yepey!!! Sem Break nA!!!

2004-10-08T22:11:00.000-07:00

haay sa wakas... sem break na..eto na ang time para makapagrelax nman akoh.. gwabeehh!! the only problem is that i don't have any companion or friend dat can be with me.. huhuh!! xempre, kami ang pinakamaagang ng sem break kya ung mga friends koh eh may mga pasok pa..kaya mejo malungkot din dahil aLa me mayaya to go out.. ang dami ko pa namang plano ngaung sem break.. kagaya ng pagpunta ko sana sa Star City ngaung Sabado, Oct. 9.. haayy!! nakakafrustrate!! guzto ko talagang pumunta don... haay buhay!!! ei, kng may boyfriend lang sana me e di sigurado xa ung kasama koh!!! hehehe!! dream on cecile, dream on!! hahaha!! nweiz,, khit ano pang mga hassles and problems mazaya pa rin ang buhay kce bakasyon na!!! heheh!! siguro maglalabasan lang ang mga problema ko on Oct. 18 kasi distribution na ng class cards non..naku!! bahala na c Lord..hehe.. lalo na sa chemistry..kce nong finals non ndi tLga me nakapgaral ehh.. ndi kce me ngicing ng alas 2..nagising ako halos 6 na kaya ndi na ako nakapagreview...hehehe.. sana pumasa akoh don.. khit 2.5 makuha koh sa Chem mazaya na ako!! haay!! un lang... in short.. i have to enjoy my vacation this sem because i know that after this, there will again be lots of reviews and studies that should be done.. haay naku!! bzta YEHEY!!!!! SEm BreAk NAH!!!!!

2004-09-19T10:10:00.000-07:00

Long time no see!!!
hmm.. yesterday evening at about 8:10, while I was doing and finishing our written report in Chemistry, a guy and a girl knocked on our door.. nagulat eko.. si Cynthia and Kevin pla un..hehe.. nangangamusta pla sila at niyayaya nila me na pumunta ng Jhocson..haay!! nong una, ayoko tLga dahil I have a lot of things to do pa and super dami tLga plus ngaung Sunday e may final exam kmi sa CWTS..Haay!! pro no choice! nahihiya me sa knila kasi nga ndi ko n rin naman sila maxado nakakasama..so in short.. pumunta me ng jhocson kahapon..andon si Lui and bezfrnd kong si Jheng..marami pang nangyari but i just want to focus sa taong I have not seen for a long time...c Levitt po un!! heheh.. he is my classmate way back our high school years.. pwomizz..sobrang gwapo nya.. hehehe.. guzto ko lng po eshare kce he acts and dresses different now.. ndi n xa katulad nong dati..but still he remains the "levitt" na crush ko and groupmate ko dati.. I'm very proud of him kce he is really a very down to earth person.. SOBRA!! bazta, makikita ko rin naman xa ulit maybe sa birthday ni Meloh and of course sa brthday koh..hehehe.. un lng.. gwapo pa rin xa mga frendzzzz....hehehe!!

Long time no see!!!

2004-09-19T10:05:00.000-07:00

hmm.. yesterday evening at about 8:10, while I was doing and finishing our written report in Chemistry, a guy and a girl knocked on our door.. nagulat eko.. si Cynthia and Kevin pla un..hehe.. nangangamusta pla sila at niyayaya nila me na pumunta ng Jhocson..haay!! nong una, ayoko tLga dahil I have a lot of things to do pa and super dami tLga plus ngaung Sunday e may final exam kmi sa CWTS..Haay!! pro no choice! nahihiya me sa knila kasi nga ndi ko n rin naman sila maxado nakakasama..so in short.. pumunta me ng jhocson kahapon..andon si Lui and bezfrnd kong si Jheng..marami pang nangyari bau i just want to focus sa taong I have not seen for a long time...c Levitt po un!! heheh.. he is my classmate way back our high school years.. pwomizz..sobrang gwapo nya.. hehehe.. guzto ko lng op eshare kce he acts and dresses different now.. ndi n xa katulad nong dati..but still he remains the "levitt" na crush ko and groupmates ko dati.. I'm very proud of him kce he is relly a very down to earth person.. SOBRA!! bazta, makikita ko rin naman xa ulit maybe sa birthday ni Meloh and of course sa brthday koh..hehehe.. un lng.. till nxt tym..

Love has come my way...

2004-09-18T01:49:00.001-07:00

love, love has come my way..
and everybody's gonna be okey..
and it will always be a happy day
because love has come my way...

haay!! I think heart evangelista really sung this song perfectly..at mukhang ngaun ko lng po xa naappreciate..hehe! haay!! ewan.. ganito pLa filing noH parang ur always floating!! haha!! ndi nman ako adik!! hehehe.. bzta.. some of my friends can relate to it..pro im really very happy!! happy because I met someone like him.. hmmm.. cno kya xa.. bzta.. magbasa2 lng po kau ng blogger koh and soon u'LL find out if who's the man I'm talking about!!! un lng..hehehe! till nxt tym..

Love has come my way...

2004-09-18T01:49:00.000-07:00

my hectic sked..

2004-09-18T01:44:00.000-07:00

hmm.. haay.. to be honest i don't know kng paano p ako ngkakaron ng tym pra magsulat dito sa blogger koH.. as in sobrang dami ko talagang gagawin! finals ko sa SocioLogy on Wed..may report ako sa Chemistry sa Monday, finals n rin ng CWTS nmin, may talumpati me sa Sining on Sat... tpos kung ano-ano pang assignments and quizzes n dapat asikasuhin..haay!! but anyway, maybe it will be fair enough for me if sometimes I should give myself a BrEAK! hmm..sana matapos n tong sem na toh..grabeh.. isa pA pala.. maLapit n po birthday koh!! hehe.. at buti pa sila Krishna nagpapalano na ng mga isusuot niLa and take note mukhang mas prepared pa sila sakin ha..haha!! pro dats okei at least maaga pa lng they are already preparing for the said event..unlike me..hehehe!! un lng.. i just do hope dat on my birthday everything will be fine.. i hope to see all my friends der and my love ones..especially c *toot* hehe.. chige po!!..

A phase of Love...a friend or a lover??

2004-09-18T01:24:00.000-07:00

He's your good friend. She's your best confidant. You have known each other for a few years and have shared meals, movies, hobbies and vacations. You have confided to each other about your latest love interest and turned to one another for support when the relationship(s) failed. You can't imagine life without your good friend.

But for a while....You've felt jealous of his dates. You've been overprotective of her since she has been seeing the jerk. You've been havingvery strong feelings of attraction and a desire for something more than friendship. Could it be that your feelings for him/her have grown into something more? If so, your relationship may have developed into a "friend crush".

You don't know what to do. You know you want to continue spending time together- more time. But it's getting hard. You fantasize about having more with this person and are beginning to feel like a jealous would-be partner. Do you pretend everything is the same? Do you start distancing yourself- hoping your feelings will go back to the way they were? Do you actually TALK directly and honestly with your friend about how you feel?What will happen to the relationship if you make the WRONG choice?

Just as all people are unique, so are the characteristics of their relationships with others. There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this increasingly common dilemma. So, let's take a look at your options.

You can:

* ignore your feelings, keep your boundaries in check and pretend everything is status quo In order to choose this option, you must be able to deny your feelings so well that even you don't know what they are. You will also have to continue being comfortable on the sidelines while someone else has the relationship with this person that you desire. You will most likely be asked what you think of this or that person and be expected to be happy and supportive of your friend when they meet the right someone for them. In return for all this, you will still have your friend.

* begin to spend less time with your friend (crush) while seeking out new friendships to pursue and strengthen. This option will most likely cause confusion and hurt on the part of your friend who will wonder what happened. They may be understanding and accepting of your need to spread your wings and support you in doing what you need to do. Either way, you will see less of them and your relationship can weaken and perhaps disappear altogether as they move on with new people. If you can distance yourself for a while and no longer feel the romantic butterflies, you can always give them a call and may be able to pick up somewhere near where you left off.

* continue the relationship with your own hidden agendas - a desire for romantic intimacy and the hope that the person will realize that they feel the same wayIf they become involved with someone else in the meantime, you can work to sabotage their new relationship or you can leave them wondering where all your anger and hurt feelings are coming from. You can spend a lot of time and energy handling it this way, without anything to show for your efforts but the loss of a good friend.

* have an open and honest discussion with your friend regarding your new feelings for them This is the choice that seems to be the hardest for folks to make. Often what I hear from people in this position is that they fear "ruining the friendship" if they discuss their feelings honestly. While this is a very understandable concern, it isn't well thought out. It is emotional, not rational.

Look again at the other options. Every one will bring about a change in your current friendship.Why?Once your feelings have changed, so does the relationship. Ignoring them, hiding them or distancing yourself will lessen your closeness and the positive dynamics that flow between good friends. You can't go back. You need to decide how you want to move forward or if this is an option for you.

It is also possible in choosing this option that you will learn that they have similar feelings for you that they were afraid to reveal. Therefore choosing this option could result in romance and a love relationship based on true friendship.Intimacy exists in all close relationships. It is the ability to be completely open and vulnerable to another without fear of harm or rejection. So, by definition, we cannot be intimate with another while hiding or denying our true feelings and needs to them.The choice will always be yours. Choosing wisely is about really knowing the options, the consequences they bring and what will be best for you and your friend.

2004-09-17T05:51:00.000-07:00

The Gift

God gave me a wonderful gift
It came while I was not expecting it
It brought me so much joy
It had to be forever

The gift had laughter and smiles
It warmed my very being
My spirit was lifted
It had to be forever

The gift had compassion and caring
It allowed me to share and to grow
My soul soared like an eagle
It had to be forever

The gift had such passion and desire
More powerful than anything I've ever known
My body was tingling
It had to be forever

The gift had love and warmth
It took my breath away
My heart swelled with emotion
It had to be forever

The gift had sorrow and longing
I ached to see you again
My heart moaned
It had to be forever

The gift had friendship and understanding
It was pure and good
My whole being rejoiced
It had to be forever

This morning when I awoke
I thought about this gift
My mind raced
It will be forever

who am I???

2004-09-04T22:12:00.000-07:00

hello!!! I'm cecile... as in C - cute, E - enthuasiastic, C - courteous, I - innocent (hmm..hehe!), L - lovable, E - extra-odrinary!!! hehehe!!! un lng po!!! nxt tym n lng ulit!!! cge.. mwuaahh!!!!